Coaching

7 Steps to Break Free
standard
01 Apr

7 Steps to Break Free

7 Steps to Break Free

1. Get clarity on the vision for your life.

Being clear on the things you want from life is the crucial first step that you need to take. It’s the most important step.
When you know where you want to go, then you can take the first step. You don’t need to see “how” you are going to get there at this stage, the “how” will come. By taking the first step, you can then start to map out the journey ahead of you, but by taking the first step you are on your way.
Your inner-intelligence will guide you to gain the clarity you need. To listen to this voice, you will need to turn down the “noise” around you.

Follow these 4 steps to get clarity on what you want from life:

a) Book an appointment with yourself, 3 times a week for 30 minutes. In that appointment switch your phone off, turn the TV off, find yourself a quiet space that you feel comfortable either sitting or lying down, that you won’t be distracted by anything. Quietly, take one deep breath to the count of 4, then hold to the count of 4 and slowly breath out to the count of 4. Repeat this 4 times. Lots of thoughts will start to come to your mind. Your brain and your body are not used to doing nothing. When this starts to happen concentrate on your breathing again and try to imagine your destination, your desire, and the feelings of achieving your goal.

b) Ask yourself the following questions and write down your answers:
• What do you want from life?

• What is the BIG dream?

• What is the one thing that you can’t stop thinking about?

• What is the most critical thing that you want to change right now?

c) Take a moment after writing them down and imagine, after achieving all of this, how it will feel when you get there.

d) Now turn the table. Imagine how it will affect your future if you choose to do nothing about moving forwards towards these goals?

2. Share your vision.

If a friend or loved one asked you right now, how life was? What would be your answer? Asking yourself this question is the first step in getting clarity on where you are in life. Then you can see where you are starting from. Your vision is then all about the destination you are aiming for in your walk from where you find yourself today. Sharing this vision with someone that you love and trust will help bring reality to it.
So that you can articulate this vision effectively, then the best thing to do is to imagine we are talking, 5 years from now.
What would be your answer to the question “How is life?”
Stop now. Take 5 minutes and switch off all distractions. Quietly imagine yourself living out a day in your life, 5 years from now. In your mind’s eye, see yourself. Imagine what you are doing, who you are with, who you are serving, where you are living and maybe even where you have just come back from in terms of your last holiday.
Open your eyes and write down what you saw.
Be sure to write down the emotions, what you feel, and what you have achieved. Write it all down. And then even the things that you didn’t see but truly and passionately want!
This may sound crazy but work with me here. You have a licence to be crazy and to be creative. It’s simple, easy and fun! This activity will help you to articulate your vision that you can then share with your friends and loved ones. Those who love and support you will empower you with positive energy and encourage you on your journey from today, to then.

3. Banish toxic people.

‘You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.’ Jim Rohn
Jim was right. And so is much of the research that has been done around this subject. It says that your behaviour, your emotions and your success in life is in direct relation and can be affected by the people you are spending the time most with.
Write a list of the five people that you spend all your time with.
Next to each name, describe whether these people are toxic or healthy for you and your life.
Toxic People are those that are always interrupting your conversations to talk about themselves. They are people that want to control every situation. They are people who tend to suck the emotional positivity out of your life with pessimistic or negative conversations. Toxic people always have dramas going on, are often jealous, judgemental and want to always put themselves first.
Healthy people are the polar opposite. They will be great listeners, more interested in your than themselves. They will always look to serve you and help when you need it. They will bend over backwards and often go the extra mile. With their positive outlook on life, they balance your relationships by being encouraging, yet will challenge you at the right times too.
Look back at your list, do you have any Toxic people there? Decide today to limit contact with them, spend less time with them. Then if you feel comfortable, delete them from your mobile phone, unfriend them, and prevent all contact.
Replace these toxic people with healthy people.

4. Create a daily morning routine.

The reality of being human, being on a mission and being busy people, is that we often find ourselves doing things that we think we ought to be doing but that don’t serve our mission.
On the other hand, there will be times that you stop yourself from stepping forward and doing something. Either a fear of getting it wrong, no idea on how to take the first step, or procrastinating over whether it or you are good enough will hold you back.
It’s time to tell yourself to stop wasting time! You, like every other human on the planet, have only 24 hours in a day. The queen, those successful entrepreneurs on their yachts, those millionaire life coaches and gurus, the unemployed people, your co-workers – they all have the same amount of time in their day as you. You just need to become creative with that time so you maximise your productivity and create habits that will enable you to do the things you are called to do and be the person you are called to be.
The best way to do this is to create a daily routine.
Let’s start with getting up – “Get up early. Don’t hit the snooze button.” says Mel Robbins, creator and author of the 5 Second Rule. When the alarm goes off, count “5.. 4.. 3.. 2.. 1..” and then shout “Do it!!!” and spring out of bed.
Those who want a successful, positively fuelled and fruitful life, all have one thing in common – a daily morning routine.
After getting out of bed they focus on these 4 things
• Setting daily goals – the “need to get done today” things. • Setting priorities and boundaries – for people and tasks. • Ask for help – realising that sometimes they need to reach out to others to get a task completed. • Fuel the body right – With a strong focus on food, nutrition and exercise
Robert Kiyosaki calls us to F.O.C.U.S – to “Follow One Course Until Successful.” With your eyes set on the goals, priorities and boundaries for the day ahead, seeking assistance when you need it and fueling your body and mind in the right way, your days will never be the same again.

5. Demolish self-limiting beliefs forever.

Did you know that you have a choice to think and act the way you do. Many will have grown up with people saying things like “she can’t help it, her mother was like that” or “he’s just following in his father’s footsteps.”

You have a choice and free will.
There is an old Cherokee Legend about a grandfather talking about life to his grandson.
“A fight is going on inside me” he said to the boy.
“It is a terrible fight between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson asked, “Which wolf will win the fight?”
The grandfather simply replied, “The one you feed.”
What wolf are you feeding? What wolf inside of you is going to win? Those thoughts that keep you trapped inside your negative thinking and stop you from living life as you should be, can be fed not just by you but also by the actions and words of others. Removing the toxic people from your life first and then dealing with your own thoughts is the best way round to look at this. Feed the good wolf. Remind yourself of this every time you feel trapped with thoughts similar to the evil wolf. Take every thought captive and choose to feed it or let it starve.

6. Be mindful of your subconscious.

Our brains and minds are wonderful computers. They can be programmed to run many programmes without us having to think about them. These are thought patterns and functions that operate in the subconscious – the part of the mind which we are not fully aware of but the part that influences our actions and feelings.
Mindfulness is the practice of focusing our awareness on the present moment and the environment around us. While calmly acknowledging and accepting our feelings, thoughts, and emotions. Medical research has shown that mindfulness will increase the “grey matter” found in the Hippocampus part of the brain that is recognised as the area responsible for the earning and memory functions. This is a good thing. It means that by practising mindfulness you will have an increased level of intuition and creative abilities, giving you greater clarity of thoughts, a greater ability to handle emotions more rationally and the ability to help you understand yourself in a fuller way.

7. Never be the victim again!

The Holocaust, was the most barbaric genocide during World War II. Nazi Germany, aided by its collaborators, murdered an estimated six million Jews – this was thought to have been around two-thirds of the Jewish population of Europe, between 1941 and 1945. One survivor described how the power of positive thinking enabled them to think, not as the inferior human that the Nazi’s told them that they were – the one thought that they repeated in their mind was,
“They cannot make me think, what I don’t want to think.”
You are the only one that can control your mind! Learning how to speak to yourself, despite your circumstances will enable you to live the purposeful life you should be living and also how to not allow others to make you feel like a victim.
Working with me, I can take you from the victim status you live in today, to a vivacious, strong and empowered, knowing, self-worth believing woman. You can become a woman who is unique, bold, loving and the best version of herself!

by / 0 Comment
How to survive in a big city and not to go crazy?
standard
06 Feb

How to survive in a big city and not to go crazy?

How to survive in a big city and not to go crazy?

Congratulations, dear Francis!
If there is something that does not suit me in our Christian religion and Western civilisation, then it is undoubtedly a terrible interpretation of the words from the Bible: “fill the earth and subdue it.” For thousands of years, these words have been used as an excuse for the predatory exploitation of Mother Earth and general disrespect for nature, thanks to which we exist on this planet.
It is exactly these words that Pope Francis referred to. The most important man of the Church admitted that it was an absolutely wrong interpretation of the Bible, he apologised and ordered immediate improvement. What, unfortunately, did not appeal very much to some politicians who see business in further contamination of the environment.
Why am I writing about all this? Because I sound the alarm! Well, I do not know if we are all aware of this, but we are now witnessing the greatest of “extinction” of the human species in the history. I am calling everyone to take immediate action to protect Mankind.


These are the facts – it is our Western civilisation that has contributed most to the destruction of nature. For millennia, it has developed according to two assumptions:

• man is something separate from nature
• we humans are the “masters” of nature and it belongs to us (depends on us).
But later this model of action was taken over by the whole world, so no one knows who to blame. Today we already know that this approach has led us to a dead end with exhausting natural resources, environmental contamination, etc. But STOP – I do not want to deal with climate protection in this text.
Let everyone have their own field, I would like to deal with Human Protection. It is amazing for me that so many people are fighting for the protection of animals, seas or climate. Who is fighting for Human Protection? Is man not a part of ecology and should not be primarily protected? Of course, this cannot be separated because in the end the Earth is a whole and if we cut down the Amazon forests or we are going to poison the oceans, we will not survive. However, we still have some time before this global catastrophe occurs. On the other hand, thousands of people are dying today and you have to save them as soon as possible! The reason for this “extinction” of the human species are the conditions in which we live, especially in cities (large and medium) and our lifestyle.

We are the witnesses of the greatest “extinction” of people in the history.

The vast majority of humanity in the so-called developed countries live in cities. And what do living conditions in cities look like? It is amazing for me, I think I will really believe some day that our civilisation was not created by people, but we are prisoners of some foreign Reptilian breed, who lead humanity to destruction. Because the living conditions we have created in cities are “from hell.”
We cultivate common, collective sadomasochism. These are strong words, but true. People doomed people to this fate. We live in tight cages built of artificial materials, full of chemistry. Some people designed and built such “prisons” for other companions in misery. We inhale polluted air, eat valueless plastic food. We spend half a life in front of the screen of electronic devices, exposing ourselves to widespread chaos and excessive stimuli. And then we are surprised that 1/3 of European society (including Poles) live in depression or have mental disorders. Not to mention the plague of civilisation diseases. It is not a coincidence or divine drive, but hard-earned results of their own actions.
“I am from the city, small and poor crankiness is born here, I live on it and will live on it” – a quote from Elektryczne Gitary, Polish pop music band.
A man is an integral part of nature and existing cities do not respect basic human rights to live in harmony with nature and close to it. The urban environment is not only “poisonous” to the body. It has the same toxicity on the mind.
But let’s not get overly pessimistic. We have already experienced worse threats – man has a unique ability to adapt and survive so we can deal with it.
But what to do? It’s about awareness, education. It is about creating ecology that will be friendly for a man. Let’s start with actions towards the Protection of Man.
If we love ourselves, love for the world will automatically be born. It always goes in this direction. I have not met a person who lives a healthy life, cares about himself and his food and would not naturally be interested in caring for the environment. So real ecology begins in us. Then such consciously living people will not be able to design and build more metropolitan prisons, but cities that are more friendly to people. We will change cities – we will give them a more “human” character.
The quality of life, contentment, mental and physical health among people living in cities instead of improving is getting worse. However, escaping from cities is not a solution. Not everyone can live in the suburbs in a detached house or buy a farm in the countryside, breed goats and live off the production of organic cheeses. This is pleasant, but for most people unavailable option.


So what to do? How to live in order not to go crazy? I present a few practical ways to deal with the challenges of living in the big city jungle.

Add more living space

Living space, though it has bad connotations with the Third Reich (Lebensraum), is a very important thing for our mind. It is not about the fact that we live very crowded in the city, this is not the biggest problem. Once, people lived “in a pile” in caves, and many tribes live in large multi-family huddles to this day. In such a crowd people did not have any great physical space and yet they were normal… Because they had ​​nature around them and could use it freely. The point is that the mind needs more space during the day even just for a moment. That’s enough for it when we spend all day in a small room, with too many stimuli and the mind is tired. It rests, relaxes and releases tension when it feels “freedom.” It is good to go for half an hour walk around a park, a square or even an empty undeveloped space once a day. It’s best not to listen to music on the phone but just let the mind “feel the surrounding space”.

Stay as close to nature as possible

Every minute spent around trees or plants, in the park or even on the square – acts as a soothing balm for a freaky mind. Put flowers on the balcony and cultivate them. Someone you know has an allotment garden – use it to maximum. Above all, the best for the mind is when it is surrounded by water – both the standing water, i.e. a pond, but the flowing water works even better. Staying and looking at the river literally “wipes out” all day stress and emotional dirt.
It is because the mind (consciousness) is like water. It takes the shape of the vessel in which it lies. If our close environment (embraced by senses) is artificial and crazy, our mind will be also like that. If even a small part of the time during the day we are in a peaceful natural environment, we regenerate quickly.
Also, being with animals is a brilliant form of working urban craziness off. Cats, dogs, horses – they are all “normal”. They do not pretend and are always full of love and peace. Because the mind is also like fire. Its condition is easily transferred from one object to another. If we are with animals – their natural tranquillity is transferred to us, our mind is simply inspired and resets. If we only stay with other “crazy” people, then our mind is even more egged on.

Change the surroundings and people – go away for weekends

Our daily life is the most troublesome because of our repetitive, schematic experiences, the same stimuli. Change it, break away from the “vicious circle” in which you live during the week for a moment. So even if you live in the suburbs, do not just sit on your lawn during weekends. Establish that if you live in a cottage, you sleep better and rest on a daily basis. This is some rest, but it’s not enough for a balance of mind. A man defending himself from depression moved to the suburbs. He quickly sold his cottage in the countryside and stopped leaving for the weekends because he still lived in the forest all the time. Well, a few years have passed and he is depressed again today. Without changing your surroundings regularly – the mind does not rest enough …
Weekends are over 100 days off during a year. They are a great gift, it is better to use them well – it is best to go to places close to nature.

Do an electronic detox

The excess of stimuli is the most tiring for mind. Electronic devices (computers, tablets and smartphones) in this context are the most “toxic”, constantly stimulating the eyes and mind to act and still exposing the so-called electronic smog. Free yourself from it during weekends. Try to limit staying in front of the screen to really necessary situations.
A mind that has an excess of stimuli and never rests cannot be healthy and normal. From the point of view of human ecology, I am not a big supporter of switching to e-versions of all magazines to read as well.
I know that paper production burdens the environment, but reading everything on the computer screen is even more of a burden on the human being. And as I mentioned, a healthy, and normal person will always care more about the environment than a stressed and sick person.

Rest is a change of the type of occupation

If we work intellectually (as most of us), when we rest, let us switch more to physical activity and body. In turn, if someone is a worker on a construction site, then the time spent with the book will be a brilliant rest.
WARNING for white-collar workers! You will not refresh your mind in your free time reading only books or watching even very clever and developing films. Because it’s the same type of stimulus (you only engage your eyes and brain).

A sound mind in a sound body

This is a truth known since ancient times. Most often it is understood that by practicing sport regularly – we also retain mental health. THIS IS GREAT TRUTH! It has been proven by a lot of researches and observations. The best would be an outdoor activity – because then we also have additional contact with nature (two in one). However, if you do not like running/Nordic walking or cycling, it’s better to go to a gym and move in a confined space than to lie and rest on the couch.
Why does physical activity work so well on the mind? There are several reasons: the most important thing is that the intense movement forces deep, rhythmic breathing. And as yoga discovered a few thousand years ago, breathing techniques (pranayama) can strongly influence the mind, which means that they can remove the effects of stress from our consciousness. Probably intense breathing is some kind of pranayama.
The second element is that sport stimulates lymph movement in the body. And this speeds up the removal of toxins. And all stresses and traumas are deposited just as toxins. By disposing of emotional toxins, we normalise the state of mind.

Stop the mind – that is the hygiene of stress on a daily basis

Do you brush your teeth twice a day? Do you take a shower? Why? Because the body gets dirty every day and accumulate toxins. Regular cleansing enabled us to free ourselves from many infectious diseases that once resulted from widespread lack of hygiene.
Well great! And what about the mind? Once the mind was not dirty because we did not have so much stress in life, so its hygiene was not so important. But today, every day we pack a lot of stress in ourselves. We must treat it in the same way as dirt.
Stress accumulated on one day is not dangerous. But if it is accumulated for many days, it becomes toxic and pathogenic. What is a solution? It’s enough to delete it regularly and we have a problem solved.
Since we devote a minimum of half an hour a day to body hygiene, the same should apply to hygiene of the mind. Everyone should get to know about some techniques – those breathing techniques, meditation, yoga, chi kung from the Far East work the fastest.

Remember that man has a unique ability to self-heal and survive, all he needs is some help and he will renew himself. The principle is simple: balance. The whole Universe has this rule in itself. Striving and returning to balance. It works like a pendulum: If you lean in one direction – then it leans in the other direction. If we are in a stressful, unnatural environment for 10 hours a day, let us spend up to 1 hour a day regenerating or staying close to nature.

by / 0 Comment
The power of the moment allows you to live happily!
standard
02 Feb

The power of the moment allows you to live happily!

The power of the moment allows you to live happily!

The present moment designates what stands between the past and the future: the current moment.

To be totally present at what one is doing, paying full attention to it, without getting caught up in one’s thoughts or acting like an automaton.

To be present is to fully “inhabit” your body and be connected to your five senses within the moment.

Most of the time, we are carried away or dominated by our thoughts or feelings.

We can be surprised to think about the future or the past often in a pessimistic or fearful way.

For example, the mind sometimes takes us to the past when we are shopping, for example, or to the future when we are in a queue. Instead of paying attention to what is happening moment by moment, we constantly think about what “could” happen, and how we “should” react to it.

In other words, we are afraid of what “could” happen, this fear amplifies our attachment to the mind and this resistance in the present moment increases our suffering.

We then tend to identify with these thoughts, to believe that we are these emotions.

And we leave reality to build another one that does not often make us happy.

The suffering created in the present comes from our non-acceptance of what is, the mind always seeks to avoid what is in the present and begins to torment us by amplifying our anxiety or our fantasies.

The mind and all our knowledge are very useful, they help us to carry out our tasks, to accomplish our work, they are true practical companions in everyday life, but they have their own limits when it comes to appreciating the present moment for what it is.

When we are released from the demands of the mind, and live in the present moment, we perceive things in a new way. Colours, sounds and sensations are more penetrating, because the mental filter no longer intervenes, so we experience more peace and a deep love for all that is.

When we are totally present, it is the conscious part of us, attentive and vigilant to every subtlety that appears and which leads us to feel a deep peace. This is how we can look back on our past without guilt or complacency and project ourselves into the future in a serene and realistic way.

To be totally in the present moment, basically, is to get out of one’s thoughts and become aware of one’s body and accept to live here and now on Earth.

To be in the present moment is to be anchored, it is to be connected to the Earth, it is to feel connected.

Being rooted in the present moment allows us to feel this deep connection that exists between us and the Earth.

This feeling of belonging to something bigger than ourselves, allows us to be more easily in the acceptance of the present moment.

Anchoring is taking your consciousness out of your head and putting it in your feet.

Returning to the earthly, real, corporeal world, the world of matter.

It is to be fully in the physical world.

By practicing our presence, we develop our serenity, our confidence, and our feeling of security wherever we are or whatever situation we are going through.

We feel more confident, more solid on our feet.

If living in the present moment is important for everyone, it is even more important for people who think a lot, to come back to the present moment, to have more positive thoughts, to feel safe, to solve some achievement problems or the feeling of “going in circles”.

Living in the present moment is one of the best solutions to protect oneself from the pessimism of the moment and soothe one’s own personal anxieties!

As you will have understood, the benefits of living in the present moment are many and varied! The present moment has an advantage over all the others because it belongs to us!

But then how can we “practice” being in the present moment?

Here are some examples of techniques that will allow you to be more present so that you can be more aware of your needs:

  • Associating the different types of memory (visual, kinesthetic, auditory): For example, saying out loud: “I’m opening my front door”.
  • Eating with full consciousness, awakening your senses (smell, taste, sight…).
  • Carry out a body scan: relax all parts of the body one after the other, in order to make all tensions disappear (paying particular attention to the following areas: neck, shoulders, lower back and legs).
  • Meditation: meditating in full consciousness leads us to regain a state of being. We become a witness to our own thoughts and physical sensations. We welcome without judgment, unconditionally what manifests itself.
  • Practising activities where the body and nature are involved (gardening, walks in the forest, in the countryside, in the mountains…).
  • Walking in full consciousness and preferably barefoot.
  • Practising yoga and breathing to feel your body and to anchor yourself in the ground.

N❤A❤M❤A❤S❤T❤E

Source link

by / 0 Comment
How to overcome fear and anxiety?
standard
08 Dec

How to overcome fear and anxiety?

How to overcome fear and anxiety?

“Courage is managing fear, not lack of fear” Mark Twain

Each of us is afraid of something. It is natural and human. It turns out that it often serves our protection, e.g. against falling, burns. But what if it prevents us from implementing our plans?

You can unlearn fear

All our fears are learned. We are not born with a fear of failure, public speaking, and rejection. So just as we have learned fear in some area, so can we unlearn it. Sometimes the help of a psychotherapist is needed, but not always.
Try to face your fears

Don’t back off saying “I can’t.” Try to overcome your anxiety, don’t hesitate to face the situation you are afraid of. Don’t let fear rob you of your strength and sense of dignity.
Imagine you’re not afraid

Control your way of thinking. Create a vision of how you overcome your fear and act confidently and effectively. When you saturate your mind with positive visions, you develop self-confidence. However, when you pursue a positive vision, you build courage.
Keep going towards fear

As you force yourself to confront your fear, it gets smaller and easier to control.
Be determined to remain persistent in working on yourself

Courage is not born in one day or one trial.

Remember, if you withdraw, anxiety will dominate the way you think and act

It is heartening to know that 99 percent of the disasters that we predict never happen. But the bad things we experience happen so quickly that we don’t have time to worry about them.

So, be self-disciplined and face your fears boldly!
Support needed

If, on the other hand, you would like to benefit from support in working with anxiety, I invite you to coaching and therapeutic sessions in Wrocław or Online.

I overcame this fear myself, so I believe that you will also succeed!

by / 0 Comment
‹12